I’m sure we all have a list similar to this one. Here are a few of my Famous Last Words.
Back in the days when I was active in church:
“I’m giving up chocolate for Lent.” Yeah, right. I don’t think I ever succeeded, bringing forth a cascade of horrible guilt feelings, yet a plethora of sinful pleasures consisting of malted milk chocolate eggs, foil wrapped coins, and other chocolaty temptations that were too much for me to resist. Many prayers pleading for forgiveness were lifted. I don’t give up anything for Lent anymore.
All of the time:
“Just one more chocolate chip cookie, and that’s it.” How can I, a cookie monster, ever convince myself, or anyone else for that matter, that I could stop with just one.
“If I had a bicycle, I’d park my car and do all of my running around on my bike.” When I lived in Tidewater Virginia, I did ride my bike a lot- to the grocery store, to the post office, and to the Chesapeake Bay. But in hilly Georgia, this statement falls on deaf ears, mainly mine. When dreaming about what fun the bicycle would be and what great exercise it would provide, I never envisioned hills. After riding my bike a handful of times, I gave up on making this a reality in my life. I no longer own a bicycle.
“Yep, I can stand on my head.” Don’t think so, at least not with the fluidness and agility I had when I was young. I still have a crick in my neck, and don’t think I’ll try it again anytime soon.
“Three more minutes, this time on Broil, and the cheese on the pizza will be melted just right.” The burned cheese was scraped off the pizza, and after the smoke alarm quit blaring, I enjoyed my tomato pizza.
About taking a shower:
At 9:00 pm, “I’m going to take my shower.” At 9:30pm, after procrastinating and getting onto Facebook or writing in my journal, “I really need to take my shower.” At 10:00 pm, after remembering that the clothes in the dryer need to be folded, “I guess I really need to hop into the shower.” At 6:00 am the next morning, I turn on the water in the shower, and step in.
About love and relationships:
“I’m going to stick with girlfriends, and stay away from men.” While I love my girlfriends, I have to admit that they don’t fill up the empty place in my heart that a good and loving man can. I have renewed hope that only girlfriends aren’t all that is in my future.
“I don’t think I will ever love again”, which goes along with “I don’t think I am able to love again,” which goes along with “I’m not sure I can ever trust a man with my heart again.” While I can’t say today that I am in love, I have discovered that deep within me is a great capacity to love and trust that I feared had been destroyed. The seeds of the ability to love are taking root, and I am beginning to believe that maybe a chance for love is within my grasp out there somewhere. Of all my famous last words, I hope these will be ones that will be erased from my life.
Famous last words – everybody has them.
What are yours?